Sharing: I Take You, A Beautiful Gift of Marriage Hope

Love is patient, love is kind. 1 Corinthians 13:4a

I TAKE YOU: A DREADED PHONE CALL


As I held the phone in my hands, I knew that it was time to make another hard call. It had been over a year since I had spoken with my family friend and counselor. She had helped me through some very tough times in the past, and even though I felt reluctant to share our latest news, I knew that the Lord was prompting me to share my need.


It’s not been easy to share the news of my husband’s terminal illness with anyone. How do you start a conversation like that?


“Hello, we’ve received word that my husband won’t be with us much longer.”


No, that’s too abrupt. Maybe this instead:


“Hello, we wanted to update you on our progress, as we are feeling the weight of our coming days.”

No, that’s a little too vague. I finally decided to just call and let the Lord lead the conversation. He knew what I needed to share, and what I needed to hear. And it was a beautiful conversation, with my friend asking the questions that I needed to face.


She wanted to know if we had found ways to truthfully communicate our feelings about the diagnosis with each other. I knew that we had only scratched the surface. So she suggested a couple of books that might spur our conversations to go deeper. I agreed that I would look into those.

But after I hung up, I realized that I had a wonderful resource from Chronic Joy already waiting for me on my bookshelf. I had wanted to read Cindee Snider Re’s book, I Take You in Sickness and Health, for several years, but the timing wasn’t right. Until the day I called my counselor.

I TAKE YOU: SHOWING KINDNESS


And so, on Sunday mornings during this summer of change, my husband and I have sat with the book and brought our hearts together to the Lord. And He has met us in ways that I could not have envisioned.


The first chapter spoke on Kindness, a topic that I had long been thinking of, especially with the Chronic Joy emphasis of “Kindness: Pass It On” that I kept coming across. However, I did not realize that in many little ways I had been showing UN-kindness to my husband throughout this exploration of our unique journeys with chronic and terminal illness.


While I knew in my heart that we each would process our illness journey in different ways, it had taken my head longer to catch up with my heart.

And so, as we took time to express our unique needs and desires for kindness, I saw such ways that my attitude needed to shift. I had been expecting him to bear his illness in the same way that I had learned to bear my illness. But he is not me, and his illness is not mine either. My heart began to see small acts of kindness that I had missed along the way. He saw things too, and we both held each other in prayer that first morning of study.

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I would love to invite you to join me over at Chronic Joy to read the rest of today’s post.

Click here to read along, and to hear the audio blog that I was so blessed to be able to share.

18 thoughts on “Sharing: I Take You, A Beautiful Gift of Marriage Hope

  1. This brings tears to my eyes, Bettie. Not only for the deep trial you and your husband are going through, but also for the way God is giving both of you grace to share deep feelings so you can better help each other. Thank you for sharing. You remain in my heart and prayers, dear friend. Love and blessings of further strength in every way to both of you!

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    1. Dear Trudy, thank you so much for your huge heart of caring for us. It really means so much! I know you understand the depth of emotions we go through when the seasons suddenly change! You and your husband are in my prayers also, dear friend! Blessings and love to you. ♥️

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    1. Thank you for your kind and loving comments here. I appreciate your prayers so very much. Truly, it is the Lord who helps us to be vulnerable in our sharing, isn’t it? Yes, He is so merciful and good to us. Blessings to you this week.

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  2. Whoo-boy. This was a tough one to read and process, Bettie. But it was also important and a wonderful reminder of the need for spouses to come together in the good and the bad and to honor their vows of being together even in sickness, as they are in health.

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    1. Oh Dear Lisa, your love and concern are such precious gifts to me. Truly our Lord is so good to help us come together when we need each other so much. Blessings and love to you this week, dear friend.

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  3. I had tears in my eyes the whole time reading this! What a beautiful way for the Lord to bring you and your husband closer! And such a great reminder that our time on Earth is limited so we should make the best of it with those we love.

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    1. Oh Bettie… I don’t know where to begin. Both you and Barry are such an inspiration to me and my family. I truly see the works of the Lord being made manifest in your life. Praying. Love y’all so much…

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      1. Dear Tim, we are so grateful for the love and prayers you and your whole family have showered upon us. I also can’t find words to describe the blessing you have been to us. God has been so very faithful! Love you all so much too!

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  4. I finished reading your post over at Chronic Joy, Bettie. Absolutely beautiful. Thank you for being transparent in your journey with illness. And so glad of God’s perfect timing. He always knows what we need before we do.

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    1. Dear Lynn, thank you for all of your encouragement and love you share. Truly He does know just what we need. You have been that gift I have needed so often, bringing tears of gratefulness to me. I pray God’s blessings over you now!

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  5. I love that you’re reading together and praying. Precious times you will hold dear. Thank you for sharing. It brings softness to my heart for bringing forth kindness in my own marriage. Praying for you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your prayers, Dear Amy. I’m not sure why it’s sometimes easier to overlook kindness for those who are the closest to us! But I’m so thankful for God’s prompting to open our hearts. Blessings to you this week!

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