“Consider how the lilies of the field grow: They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his glory was adorned like one of these. . .” Matthew 6:28,29
I must not be doing enough of something. Or I must be doing too much of something else. Surely this new addition to my list of complications can’t be right. The Rheumatoid Disease has been responding to this latest medication; the therapy for Fibromyalgia has been helping me to learn to walk through the days of low energy or high pain; even the Dry-Eye-Syndrome that comes with RA is treatable. Surely, I thought, this Bone Density Scan would be a piece-of-cake. Breeze through this, and I would be home-free, nothing else added to the mix for a while.
But the results did not agree with my own assessment. The Rheumatologist called right back with the results and began a new medication for my weakened bones: Osteoporosis, the nurse said.
How could I have felt God’s Presence reassuring me so sweetly before the test, but then have another label added to my day?
My Mom had Osteoporosis. Quite debilitating for her in fact. She had required a high dose of steroids for a one-time rare condition, and was left with a “dowager’s hump” as an unpleasant reminder. She refused treatment for bone-strengthening, and I vowed to myself that I would never be like that. I would not become the one who required help, but would not help herself. And so I hardened my heart in the process. Work hard. Take care of others. Do all the right things.
Ahh, God is so merciful. He doesn’t leave us alone in our hardness of heart. No, He looks deeper to the places where our true desires lay. And He saw in my heart the longing to draw closer to Him, to find new intimacy with Jesus. But intimacy and hardness of heart cannot co-exist. So a chisel is sometimes required to break open those hard places.
This stony heart is being shattered once again. When I thought it had been uncovered and opened more than was possible, God has found another layer, ready for His touch.
Time to cease striving once again. Time to be still in the Master’s Hand. No laboring or spinning is required there. He will array me in the garment of His choosing, where my bones are under His care, and the beauty comes to a heart softened for Him.
“Under Thy wings, my God, I rest,
“Under Thy wings, my God, I rest,
Under Thy shadow safely lie;
By Thy own strength in peace possessed,
While dreaded evils pass me by.”
–A. L. Waring
Linking up at #TellHisStory with Jennifer Dukes Lee today.
7 thoughts on “Look at the Lilies”
I am praying for you, friend! I am not sure if you were the one I replied to on #TheHappinessDare launch team page but if so, small online world! I am your #TellHisStory neighbor and I am so glad I got to stop by and read this. Your words are beautiful and real. I totally get ya with the “do all the right things robot mode!” God is constantly peeling back layers on me as well.
Thank you for your kind words, Meg! I am so grateful that God never stops working on our hearts! I am not the one you replied to on the launch team page, but I have come across your posts through other link-ups. And, I have wanted to follow your blog for a while, so I'm adding you to my list today! –Blessings!
Oh Bettie, how discouraging another diagnosis tag must be to add to your mind, but friend, YOU are not defined by a label or a disease. You are a beautiful soul encased in a body that won't cooperate sometimes but know I am praying for you and I am so grateful to have met you through this little world we blog in 🙂 Your words about God peeling away the layers of our stony hearts is so fitting for all of us who struggle with things that harden our hearts — know you are not alone! Sending love your way! xoxo
Thank you Valerie for your kind words! I appreciate your prayers and online friendship so much! Sometimes these things that the world throws our way makes us feel like we will be swallowed up! But I am so thankful that God knows just how to send the help that we need. Yes He is so good to us! –Hugs to you my friend!
I am reading another fibromyalgia, Sarah Knootz shared her struggles with this chronic disease.i am so sorry you have to go through osteoporosis on top of that.
There's so much going on behind the screen.
Holding hands with you Bettie in prayers.
Blessings to you,Bettie.
Oh thank you for your kind words and prayers! Yes, you are right, there is always so much going on behind the screen, which makes it even more precious when we can open our hearts and find a safe place to share in this online community of Faith! And, thanks for pointing me over to Sarah's blog, I'm touched by her journey as well! –Blessings to you today, my friend!
You are most welcome. Hugs and keep pressing on 😚😘